20 historic wills written solely to upset the family

The famous German poet left his entire fortune to his wife, Mathilde, but his generosity came with a notoriously cruel condition. He had stipulated in writing that she could only access these funds if she remarried. That way, there would be at least one man to mourn his death every day.

A lawyer from Iowa, who deeply despised women, decided to place his entire fortune in a strictly confidential trust for a completely absurd purpose. He specified that the money was to earn interest for seventy-five years in order to finance the construction of a library where no women would be admitted. As a result, his daughter was left penniless.

Upon her death, this wealthy oil heiress chose to completely exclude her relatives in favor of her beloved collection of stray dogs. As a result, about 150 lucky dogs inherited several million dollars. This sum allowed them to enjoy a luxurious estate and first-rate veterinary care for the rest of their lives.

A British man who was forbidden from smoking his favorite cigarettes during his wedding found a brilliant way to get his revenge. He left her a colossal fortune of several hundred thousand pounds, on the sole condition that she start smoking.

This Canadian lawyer loved to pull off elaborate pranks. In fact, he used his death as an opportunity to organize the most chaotic contest Toronto has ever seen. He bequeathed most of his immense fortune to the mother in the region who would give birth to the most children during the decade following his death.

This eccentric philosopher decided not to entrust his remains or his fortune to a traditional funeral home. He demanded that his body be stuffed, dressed in his finest clothes, and placed in a chair inside a glass display case at University College London. His friends and loved ones were forced to comply with his demands.

This wealthy businessman wanted to control his son’s love life even after his death. He declared that his son would be completely cut off from the family inheritance if he did not marry a Jewish woman. The legal battle that ensued was chaotic, to say the least.

An extremely wealthy timber magnate from Michigan harbored a deep resentment toward his children. This led him to lock away his money for nearly a century. His will stipulated that his immense fortune could not be touched or distributed until twenty-one years after the death of his last surviving grandchild.

One might think that receiving nothing in a will is a bad thing. But this nobleman made sure his son would feel the full bitterness of a very unusual inheritance. He left the young man a single penny, along with a long letter detailing every disappointment the boy had caused him.

This billionaire hotel magnate stunned the world by leaving a trust fund worth several million dollars to her Maltese dog. Her human grandchildren received absolutely nothing—or had to meet very strict criteria.

A fervent believer in reincarnation, this wealthy Vermont businessman wanted to ensure that he would want for nothing upon his inevitable return to Earth. He set up a massive trust fund for the sole purpose of maintaining his mansion and keeping on a full staff to prepare dinner every evening, in case his spirit were to walk through the front door.

A 19th-century eccentric decided to devote his colossal fortune to building an architectural marvel designed for cats. His will set aside funds for the construction of a massive cat hotel, complete with dormitories, play areas, and a resident accordionist tasked with entertaining them.

This British aristocrat deeply despised his younger brother. He had legally forbidden him from selling—or even simply looking at—the famous family art collection, which was locked away in a private safe.

The famous author decided to completely deprive a healthy friend of any financial benefit. But he offered him something far more original. He legally transferred his own birthday to a young girl who complained about being born on Christmas Day.

A wealthy Argentine man wanted to make sure that his lazy relatives actually worked to earn their inheritance. His will stipulated that his cousins would receive their share only if they performed several years of manual labor at a public institution. It’s easy to imagine the horror these pampered individuals must have endured.

This French woman decided that her fortune should be used to showcase a very specific fashion choice. She bequeathed her entire fortune to her favorite parrot, on the condition that the bird be dressed in a new satin gown every week.

Upon his death, a wealthy British landowner used his fortune to fuel a lifelong rivalry between his sons. He bequeathed a vast estate to his two sons. But he stipulated that if either of them grew a mustache, he would immediately forfeit his share of the inheritance to his brother.

A Hollywood actor decided that his final act should include a direct slap in the face to his ex-wife, who had annoyed him for decades. He left her just one dollar, stating in the official document that she already knew perfectly well why she didn’t deserve a single cent more.

This brilliant playwright chose to use his substantial royalties to fund the creation of an entirely new phonetic alphabet. He hated the English writing system so much that he wanted his money to be used to replace it entirely. That is how he created the Shavian alphabet.

An American patriot wanted to show his devotion to his country. He asked that his body be made into two drumheads, which would be given to a local drummer so he could play the national anthems. His family was faced with this unsettling reality after his death.